The Bangles: “Manic Monday”
A: I’ve found the cure for a case of the Mondays.
K: Not using the phrase a case of the Mondays?
A: Manic Monday.
K: The Bangles song?
A: No. Well…sort of.
K: Ok.
A: Manic Monday is about doing something during the late afternoon on Monday—unarguably the fucking doldrumsest time of the doldrumsest day—to take back the day, which, due to its symbolism of our primarily dull and wasted existence, in effect takes back our lives.
K: Hmm. Alright, what do you have in mind?
A: It’ll be different every Monday. That is key—the variation. Also the spontaneity of it. I just thought of what we can do on my way over to your desk: drop a matchstick-head-filled tennis ball from the seventh floor deck.
K: Whoa.
A: Pretty good, right? Pretty manic?
K: More like maniac. Maybe it should be Maniac Monday.
A: But then I couldn’t play the song. That’s part of it. We bring my iPod and your portable speaker so that we can play Manic Monday while we partake in the Manic Monday activity.
K: That is a good song… But couldn’t we kill someone doing this? If it even works, that is. I don’t think this thing even works. It’s an old vandal’s myth from middle school. You always hear about some kid doing it but no one’s ever seen it.
A: It works. It’s in The Anarchist Cookbook. By Julia Child.
K: What? Julia Child didn’t write the fucking Anarchist Cookbook.
A: Dude, she was a seven-foot-tall spy and a chef. You do the math.
K: That’s not even an equation.
A: This is all out there.
K: Clearly.
A: I mean it’s public knowledge. Since her death. But this is beside the point. You were asking about murder by matchstick-head-filled tennis ball explosion. Won’t happen. We’ll be dropping the ball into that little park between buildings. No one’s really in it at this time. If there is, we’ll wait. Ideally, we’ll cause a scare but no casualties.
K: You know Prince wrote that song, right?
A: What?
K: Prince. He wrote Manic Monday.
A: Oh my god how did I not know that? Even better! Let’s go! You’re in, yes? Of course you’re in.
K: Just another Manic Monday, right?
A: Yes and no, dude. Yes and no.