What a Fool Believes

Aloha, I’m Miss Hawaiian Tropics
Buxom, sun-kissed and myopic
I pose on the beach in a bikini
Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny
At a grody shoot in San Diego
Photog’s face is such a dumb show
When a big-ass beast flops onto my mark
The runner-up screams, all goes dark

And we are all snacks for the Super Shark
Yes, we are all snacks for the Super Shark

Still blonde, handsome, though a little haggard
Yes, I am a Duke of Hazzard
I fixed-up the General Lee for the sea
Studied marine biology
You know me and so think I’m safe to sail
Yet, the big-ass fin, big-ass tail
Well, it’s time for one last caustic remark
Before the teeth rip me apart

‘Cause we are all snacks for the Super Shark
Yes, we are all snacks for the Super Shark

‘Course I’m the heroine—check out my spunk
Call me “Catfish” and call me drunk
Barkeep: coffee—I need to sober some
Don’t want us all to become chum
I know the ocean but I talk like wood
As my plot must be understood
Grab all the tanks, it is time to embark
All of our lives are but a spark

For we are all snacks for the Super Shark
Yes, we are all snacks for the Super Shark

I am the Great White Digital Monster
A pixel-powered predator
Chomp them up before I hear the complaints
That I’m born of Microsoft Paint
My attacks will be shared from pier-to-pier
Till I scarf up this big blue sphere
Our roles and fates sealed—So why all the fuss?
Accept death for it is a rush

When we’re all crushed by Mega Octopus
Yes, we’re all crushed by Mega Octopus