19th
Enter Trapper and Dog.
Bear: RRRRRROOOOOOAAAAAAAARRRRR!
Trapper: Ho!
Bear: Did you just call me a ho?
Trapper: Huh?
Bear: You yelled, ‘Ho!’ when you saw me.
Trapper: …Oh, yes, to stop the dog.
Bear: Oh, alright. You got any sprouts?
Trapper: Sprouts?
Bear: Yeah. Alfalfa. Though Brussels would be good too. But preferably Alfalfa.
Dog: (Whispers.) Don’t do it.
Trapper: (To Dog.) What?
Dog: Don’t give him any sprouts.
Trapper: Why not?
Bear: What are you two whispering about?
Dog: Something that doesn’t concern you.
Bear: Did you just call me a slut?
Dog: What?
Bear: You said, ‘Slut, that doesn’t concern you.’
Dog: ‘Something’. I said ‘Something’.
Bear: Alright. How about those sprouts? Any luck on that front?
Trapper: (To Dog.) Why don’t we just give him a few? We got plenty.
Dog: No. This is how it starts. You toss him a few sprouts and then he’s asking for whole wheat bread. And then tomatoes. And then salmon. And then mayo.
Trapper: That sounds like a sandwich.
Bear: Did you just call me a bitch?
Trapper: No.
Bear: Huh. Alright. Breaking News: This Bear Still Looking for Sprouts.
Dog: (Whispers.) How obnoxious.
Bear: ‘Turn tricks’?
Trapper: I’m sorry, we don’t have any sprouts. Goodbye.
Trapper and Dog exit.
Bear: (In announcer’s voice.) ‘Will the Bear find sprouts? Will trappers and dogs cease to judge the Bear for his sexually promiscuous lifestyle? Find out next week on: The LiBeartine!’
